I want to walk on stilts...naked
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
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