when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
