I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
