i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
