since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
