he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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