I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
