:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
