This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Randomize
