i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
