what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
