let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
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