That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize