i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
