So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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