I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize