I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
