Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
