Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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