just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
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