I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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