my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
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