are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
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