butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
