Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Randomize
