I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
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