Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Randomize
