i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
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