she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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