i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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