THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
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