i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize
