i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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