Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
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