I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
