It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Do vagina's smell?
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize