Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
