Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Randomize
