It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
