We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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