I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Slut skills are useful in every country.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
