Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
