its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
