I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
