The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
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