She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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