Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
