Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
