Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
