So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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